It is always tricky when someone turns you down and says No. Be it an individual favor or a business pitch, and it can be hard to swallow rejection. Sometimes, because we fear being rejected because of internal shame or embarrassment or because of how we were brought up, we sabotage our relationships and opportunities, which would be good for us. So, to understand and realize how you can accept rejection, it might be worth attempting to understand why you fear rejection in the first place. Now the question is, How Well Can You Overcome Rejection?
Here are 10 Tips for overcoming rejection.
Accept It
Mr. Brian Jones, a therapist in Seattle, explained that rejection is a pretty universal experience, and fear of rejection is widespread. It never feels right when something doesn’t happen the way you wanted, but not all life experiences turn out the way you desire. Reminding yourself that rejection is just a normal part of life, something everyone will face at some point. Accepting the situation may help you fear it less.
Validate Your Feelings
Before you can begin addressing your feelings around rejection, it’s essential to acknowledge them. Telling yourself that you don’t care about getting hurt when you do denies you the opportunity to confront and manage this fear productively.
Look For The Lessons
It may not seem right away, but rejection can provide opportunities for self-discovery and growth. For example, say you apply for a job you want and have a great interview, but you don’t get the job. This might devastate you at first. But after taking a second look at your resume, you decide it wouldn’t hurt to brush up on some skills and learn how to use a new type of software. After a few months, you realize this new knowledge has opened doors to higher-paying positions you previously weren’t qualified for.
Know Your Worth
Rejection is often simply a case of needs not matching up. Ghosting is never a good approach, but some people lack good communication skills or think saying, “You’re nice and cute, but I didn’t quite feel it,” might hurt you when, in fact, you’d appreciate the honesty. In addition, building up self-confidence and self-worth can help you remember that you’re entirely worthy of love, making you less afraid of continuing your search for it.
Keep Backup
If you’re more sensitive to rejection and spend much time worrying about it, you might imagine many worst-case scenarios. For example, suppose you didn’t get into your graduate program of choice. Then, you might start worrying that all the programs you applied to will reject you, and you’ll have to try again next year. But then you start to worry that you’ll be rejected next year, too, which will make it impossible to get the job you want and advance your career, which will make it impossible for you ever to become financially stable enough to accomplish your dream of homeownership and a family, and so on.
Face The Challenge
If you don’t put yourself out there, you won’t experience refusal. But you probably won’t attain your goals either. Going for what you want gives you the chance to experience success. You might experience rejection, but then again, you might not. So, face the situation fearlessly.
Avoid Negative Conversation
It’s easy to fall into a pattern of self-criticism after experiencing rejection. You might say things like, “I knew I’d mess that up,” “I didn’t prepare enough,” “I talked too much,” or “I’m so boring.”
But this reinforces your belief that the rejection was your fault when it might have had nothing to do with you. If you believe someone will reject you because you aren’t good enough, this fear can move forward with you and become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Positive thinking doesn’t always make situations turn out a certain way, but it can help improve your perspective. When you encourage and support yourself, you’re more likely to believe in your own potential to achieve your goals. And if things don’t work out, practice self-compassion by telling yourself what you’d tell a loved one in the same situation.
Lean on Your Network
Spending time with people who care about you can reinforce your desired knowledge. A good support network delivers encouragement when you try to achieve your goals and comfort if your efforts don’t succeed. Knowing your loved ones have your back, no matter what happens, can make the possibility of rejection seem less scary. However, trusted friends can also assist you in practicing disclosing yourself to rejection scenarios you’re afraid of.
Talk to a professional
The psychological theory says rejection fears can have long-lasting effects, including preventing you from going after ample opportunities at school or work. It’s possible to overcome rejection fears on your own, but professional support is sometimes beneficial. It may be time to consider reaching out to a therapist if your fear of rejection leads to anxiety or panic attacks and causes distress in your daily life.
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